Running up a hill

posted by: Vixen

“All you can do is be ready for the good.  So when it comes you invite it in.  Bc you need it.  I need it.
~Vampire Diaries

Most of the time I feel as if I have a handle on LIFE.  That I can rock the mom/wife gig fairly ok.  It’s what I *DO*!  I have my daily routine with the kids, the animals, PC, my life.  I LIVE for routines and schedules.  I do feel as I get older more settled in life I am able to be a bit more spontaneous and deal with changes a bit better than I used to.  If we have to deviate from our ‘normalcy’ once in awhile I take those changes in better stride than I might have used to.

But then, there are days like this week.  Where nothing goes as planned.  Where I haven’t gotten a good nights sleep in days.  Bc of anxiety ridden dreams that who knows where in the hell they are coming from.  A sick child up one night.  A different sick child up the next night.  One coughing so hard it makes *me* hurt.  The other unable to sleep bc of such a bad headache.  So one stays home for two days.  Meanwhile the other childs schedule of school and soccer doesn’t provide leniency for a sick sibling.  Then.  To only, truly test my sanity, my dog that I love just about as much as my children….  The one that was sick over the summer….  Is sick again.  Same symptoms, only 10x worse then before (who knew that was even possible). It was determined before to be bacterial hepatitis.  This will be bout #4.  I’m…a mess.

And the person I lean on, that I really need a hug from, has been away on business.  Figures, no?

“Running up that hill”

It doesn’t hurt me.
You wanna feel how it feels?
You wanna know, know that it doesn’t hurt me?
You wanna hear about the deal I’m making?
You be running up that hill
You and me be running up that hill

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
If I only could, oh…

You don’t wanna hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware that I’m tearing you asunder.
There’s a thunder in our hearts, baby.
So much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don’t we?

You, be running up that hill
You and me, be running up that hill
You and me won’t be unhappy.

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building,
If I only could, oh…

C’mon, baby, c’mon, c’mon, darling,
Let me steal this moment from you now.
C’mon, angel, c’mon, c’mon, darling,
Let’s exchange the experience, oh…’

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
With no problems

‘If I only could, be running up that hill.’
~Placebo


I guess nothing beer…  And sex… won’t fix.  Temporarily.  
*sigh*

depressed-woman

~ xo

Vixen

15 Responses to “Running up a hill”

  1.   TUGNo Gravatar Says:

    Oh dear. I can only imagine how frazzled you feel. I know the puppy situation is very stressful as well. If you need any help while PC is away just let me know. I’m only tied down a few days of the week. {{{Vixen}}}

  2.   osbassoNo Gravatar Says:

    If you need a hug, I’ll drive down to give you one!

  3.   The Levi StoreNo Gravatar Says:

    I sensed you were hassling! I really did! All I can say is to take it slowly, one day at a time..
    Maybe some chemical sleep? And the beer an sex! :)

  4.   MinorityReportNo Gravatar Says:

    Ugh. Sorry to hear things have been rough. I hope they improve soon.

  5.   hubmanNo Gravatar Says:

    I hate when weeks like that happen. Hope it gets better for you (and the kids! and the puppy!!) real soon!

  6.   DanaNo Gravatar Says:

    {{{{{HUGS}}}}

    That’s just repayment of one of the many you’ve given me …

  7.   Westcoast WeirdoNo Gravatar Says:

    He’s gotten worse? Did you take the fecal in – how long until they get back to you??

  8.   better late than neverNo Gravatar Says:

    It always seems that stuff like this happens when my husband is away. When my kids were little, as soon as he left, one of them would get sick or it would snow.

    It WILL get better! Hugs to you!

  9.   Chef TrollNo Gravatar Says:

    Hang in there, kiddo. Have an ice cold Peroni on me.

  10.   Joker_SATXNo Gravatar Says:

    Can I say that I am right there with you? Its Wednesday right? I don’t even have a grip on what day it is….

  11.   Barefoot DreamingNo Gravatar Says:

    Oh man…. I absolutely hate those days/weeks. I have been there, am there, or will be right back there soon. Good thing you enjoy running ;) although not uphill.

    Here, I have an extra beer – oh, and LOOK, my shoulder is empty.

  12.   vixen kittenNo Gravatar Says:

    *hugs* LOTS of *hugs*

    You know you are in my thoughts and prayers, and you know how to reach me if you need to vent.

    Please hang in there and let me know how he is doing. I’ll be here in worry along with you. I know how that feels.

    With love,
    ~vk~

  13.   frenchiesNo Gravatar Says:

    I just wanted to send you some love. I feel for you and hope that things return to normal quickly.

    extra kisses
    frenchies

  14.   sexie sadieNo Gravatar Says:

    Wow, that’s a tough week, lovie! I’ve been having some tough days myself. I’m sorry about your doggie, and I hope your kids are feeling better. Stay strong and don’t get sick yourself. Hopefully things will get better soon.

    xo~Sadie

  15.   phairheadNo Gravatar Says:

    you know that’s a cover version of a Kate Bush song. She’s fucking fabulous!

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