Dana

I don’t do NSA sex well either … AT.ALL I can go into it logically and justify to myself why it can be NSA … then I realize that for me? Sex is about 5% physical and 95% emotional/psychological. NSA just isn’t possible when you are 95% invested in emotions. Like you, there are times when I sure do wish I were better at it though.

  Maggie

I think it’s the Dating for Dummies book and other related resources that have gotten us all into this mess. We read and research and overthink and try to react the way we’re “supposed to” but then they are trying to react to us the way they’re “supposed to” and it doesn’t work for anyone. Why can’t people just not think and just go with it?

  Vixen

Maggie- I def can do the ‘go with it’ part…but am working on the ‘just not think’. It’s the obsessive side of me that I’m needing to curb. LOL

  hubman

And there needs to be a dating manual for you ladies as well! lol….

  vixen kitten

I completely relate to this post. It’s one of the many reasons I just prefer women. Well, and the fact that most of them don’t act like idiots so much of the time. Oh…and that they aren’t hairy and stupid. Ok, I’ll stop there. :)

I don’t do NSA. I don’t want to figure out how to. I like it just the way it is. I don’t want it to ever get ordinary and mundane. Something I do without thinking….like brushing my teeth. That would just suck ass.

♥
~vk~

  Emmy

I find there are certain situations where NSA sex works for me. However, most of the people we play with again and again, we have good relationships with – friendships where we can have conversation. We check in with each other to see how things are going even when we don’t have plans. Why? Because we are also friends.

I guess it depends on how NSA is defined for you. I’m not looking to replace the relationship I’m in right now with my husband. And if I wanted fucking, I’d go to a swinger club and fuck for fun. But, if there is hope of it being a regular thing with a particular person or persons – there will always be strings. I mean, we are all human – humans care about people. It’s how far do you take the caring, you know?

  Barefoot Dreaming

I sucked at dating – h.o.r.r.i.b.l.e. a plane crash would have been easier to watch. I was and still am emotionally invested in people, no matter how hard I try.

I wouldn’t want to do the non feeling sort of thing though – it wouldn’t be true to me though.

I get it…. sigh…..

All I can say is, just remember this is for fun , have fun and enjoy the ride

  westcoastweirdo

OMG just last night Linda had a booty call & the guy wanted to talk while he was pounding her. Not dirty talk, but like wanted to have a normal conversation about their ‘relationship’. She was like, wtf, are you serious?? LOL

  Sage

Dang if it doesn’t seem that the “feel” and “over think” cause most of the problems in all relationships, no matter what, be it NSA or otherwise.

I was always easy and thought all guys were, I always thought “feed em and fuck em” can you cook? LOL

Good Luck.

  Vixen

Hubman- point taken, lol.

VK- no, I’m not looking for ordinary or mundane either. Just to feel a bit less so it’s not so *difficult*. Sigh……..

  Vixen

Emmy- what you said here made SO much sense to me! And really made me feel a bit validated.

I’m not looking to replace the relationship with my husband either. Absolutely not. And as I’ve said before, I DO have to feel a click to even make it past convo to anything else.

So for me it’s finding the happy medium bwtn that and NSA sex for the sake of ‘sex’ w/o anything else.

Thanks for what you said. Very helpful.

  Vixen

BD- I’m not capable of ‘not feeling’. Never have been and at this stage in my life I’m not capable of it now either.

But as I just said to Emmy, I would like to find a happy medium. Bc as you pointed out, this is for fun. I need to learn how to sit back and enjoy the ride more. :)

  Vixen

LMAO Roxy. Yeah….I’m all about talking but um, lets not do THAT during sex! *snort*

Sage- so true. Stupid feelings! ;)

  Professor Fate

I have always said that men are simple creatures. Many of the conflicts between boys and girls are caused by women over-analyzing or men under-analyzing words and actions.

The following his and hers diaries joke sums up these difference.

HER DIARY
Saturday night I thought he was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friend all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.

Conversation wasn’t flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong he said nothing. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior; I don’t know why he didn’t say I love you too . When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched T.V. He seemed distant and absent. Finally I decided to go to bed, about 10 minutes later he came to bed and to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.

I decided that I could not take it anymore so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

HIS DIARY
Played AWFUL today! Shot a 98. I can’t putt for shit!!!!

Got laid though.

  Vixen

LOL! I’ve seen something similar to that before Prof Fate. I need to keep THAT kind of stuff in mind ;)

Thanks your input, as always. xo

  Barefoot Dreaming

first time I laughed today – thanks PC…funny

  TUG

We’re just as confused. Hell, we couldn’t tell you what we want even if you asked us straight out. Except for the obvious, that is. Maybe you should rename yourself to Obvious ;)

  Inferno

Being male I can say that we men are so simple it doesn’t take any sort of manual to figure us out.

It is more like a few index cards.
One for each generic type of male and then a general care card that explains how we can so easily be controled and manipulated.

We are so simple and easy.

  Paris Loggins

Hey everyone, greetings from Poland. This is a helpful site. Does anyone have any advice about staying out of the friend zone with girls? Honestly I’m sick of women telling me they just want to be friends. Maybe I’m being too nice?

  Angelique Smitreski

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