Sleep has alluded me for weeks now. So much on my mind…so much to think about and work out…unaccustomed to sleeping alone…the demons which seem to haunt me in my dreams at night visit often…

In the early morning light I’ve finally been able to find that momentary peace of restful sleep with two of my favorite girlies, Annie and Grace….and him.

 *Deeply sighing happily*

~ xo

Vixen

Friday Favorites-

So…the girls this week….damn.  Here are this weeks favorites, if you haven’t done so already, click the links and hit them up. 

Janie… Hundred Ways To Be Perverse…..

Emmy…Right Turn With Out Signaling…..

My Hot Raven…..

*****

This week…man.  *shaking head*

I spent the first part of it a teensy (major understatement) bit overwhelmed. 

Our 5month old Texas Heeler puppy, Emma, had a fluke accident that resulted in a very serious injury (a sharp spiral fracture in her Tibia, the Fibula was broken as well). 

Requiring very difficult decisions to be made on very short notice.  Decisions and I.  Admittedly I’m not very good at them.  Decisions under pressure?  Even worse.  PC was incredibly sweet at remaining calm and standing behind me, offering support.  Several of my friends were there for me exactly when I needed them to be.  (thank you….)

I hadn’t been getting enough sleep.  I mean I never get much night time sleep but am usually able to compensate with a cat nap and/or one night a week where I just crash and can truly recharge.  I was lacking on the ‘recharging’.  Which meant I was running on empty more so than I’m able to function on (very well at least). 

I was mentally and physically exhausted.  And spent.

Unfortunately= me—> extremely emotional.  Which given the first few previous things…yeah.  Makes sense.

There have been several other stressers that have added to the ‘fun’ this week.

But. 

Emma came out of orthopedic surgery like a champ Wednesday afternoon, so much so they released her to me that night.  She/we have a long road of recovery ahead of us but she’s going to be ok.  ((((Babygirl)))

Our weather has been fabulous.  I’ve been able to run along my favorite trail system all week, getting in 25miles.  I saw a magnificent buck Elk less than 10′ from me on it’s way to get a drink from the river (one of the few times I wished I had my cell on me when running).  And on another day, a calf being born (spring is coming!!!).  When you get out there and stretch your legs, breathing in the fresh air, with the perfect playlist on your iPod….I feel as if I can run forever.  (Unfortunately my knees and hips haven’t been as pleased about this…  *oaff*)

I’ve since gotten a bit of much needed ‘catch up’ rest.  Have found a bit better head space.  Things are never perfect but they can at least be peachier.  And that they are.

*****

Oh. And um….  I’m thinking you might be (reeeaaally) interested in reading something SHE posted. 
*ahem*
Did you click?
(yeah)

Enjoy your uh, weekend.

~ xo

Vixen

Friday Favorites-

Cheeky Minx…..

Jas…..

Ruby…..

Scintillectual…..this is from last week and *somehow* I missed it ??? …I KNOW!!!

Don’t forget to hit the girls up!

*****

Thursday was insane.  It was LP’s birthday.  She’s officially eleven going on sixteen.  *sigh*  She’s an amazing little girl.  The most compassionate child I have ever met for sure.

The stork also delivered five puppies to our happy little homestead.  Ok, ok, Daisy did most of the work, with the help of her mid-wife (me).  Any plans I had away from home were thrown out the window so I could sit with her through out the day to help.  Both mommy and babies are doing fabulous.  And so far *fingers crossed* she’s doing a better job than last time (when I had to all but raise them myself bc she wanted so little to do with them) .  I did manage to bake two cakes and make LP’s favorite dinner despite the crazy, hectic day.

I AM feeling better-ish.  The cough is wrecking havoc on me still, as well as the voice is having a difficult time coming back.  But anything is an improvement over the beginning of this week.  PC says he wants his ‘other’ wife back.  The one that isn’t  (I believe his words were)  ‘fucked up and defective’.  *snort*  Meaning, he wants the non-sick, non-comatose, non-talking bc she isn’t able to speak above a hoarse whisper, FUN, flirty, bubbly wife back.  (HA! No shit! ME TOO!!!)  I’m working on it.  ~grins~

*****

Have a fabulous weekend!  Mine consists of a slumber party with giggling tween girls, nanny to a litter of puppies and more. rest (I refuse to relapse!).

~ xo

Vixen

Let’s see.  This weekend was a complete whirlwind.  PC and I unexpectedly had Friday evening to ourselves.  To which we decided to celebrate by staying up until 4:30 am.  Talking…  What?! We did.  ~wink~

*yawn* 

Spent Saturday soooooooooooooo tired.  But childless, so it was the perfect opportunity to veg and read.  Later that afternoon we enjoyed our awesome weather- that had cooled from the 98 degrees it was the day previously to mid 80′s with a nice breeze-  outside on a bar patio drinking beer. Where my light weight husband became quite buzzed off his half of a Blue Moon.  *snort*  Gotta love him, no? My sister texted me saying she wanted to out.  So, all impromptu like we agreed to meet her.  Her awesome hubby (who is not much of a party-ier) took all five kiddos to a movie in the park while PC, sis and I headed to a fabulous new bar she’d discovered a few months back.  Roof top patio with a downtown vibe, yet only 10min from sis house (who lives very not downtown).  Sah-weet!

Met an incredibly *HOT* girl.  We actually felt badly for her, she was with a large group of people who all obviously knew each other, and she- quite obviously- did not know them.  So we (as in I insisted PC go) invited her to join us.  Which she did and stayed with us the rest of the night.  Ironically we have the same first name.  And ironically we graduated from the same high school.  We did not, however, graduate in the same year….or actually really even the same decade.  *ahem*  She’s an exotic dancer and could be a dead ringer for Thirteen from House….with a splash of Amy Winehouse (the non druggy version).  Um yeah….she had it totally going on.  Fun times…

I did however, mix my alcohol (huge no-no in the Vixen handbook).  Beer, Patron and Vodka, with a splash of Cranberry……  Caused the need to nurse a hang over/fog most of Sunday (I’m never hung over- gah).

*****

The downside of the weekend though was my 19 year old cat passed away.  Shalimar lived a long, happy life.  I swear she used up at least 7 of them through out her years.  Being a Siamese, she was a one person cat, a fabulous cat.  She was my first baby, we were very attached.  We’d been through a lot together.  She began going downhill last weekend and I knew it was only a matter of time.  My heart is hurting.  *sigh* 

*****

Ok.  Well.  Enjoy your Monday.

(vi.sualize.us)

~ xo

Vixen

So. Remember when I used to play Mute Monday (before I got too busy to play and then Troll discontinued it)? That cool photo meme on Mondays, where you had to come up with pictures to match the assigned theme for that week? Well. Pretend we are doing that. Bc it’s late, been a long day, my thoughts are discombobulated and this is the best way I can think of to give you any sort of post/recap of my weekend. So let’s pretend and play along. Ok? Ok…..

Headed downtown Friday afternoon to meet up with Yummy.  Traffic suuuuuuuuuuuuuucked ass.  Huge reason why I love living in the country, city life is fun to visit but definitely not for me full time.  But honestly, once you get past the traffic and to your destination- fun is always found.

Brought along essentials…..

and *of course*

Barely made it into the room before…..
(sex in a dress, panties pushed aside…HOT…..)

(vi.sualize.us)

Fixed ourselves up to head out for a night on the town…..

Dinner was a must. We both agreed food before partying would be a good thing.  Conversation.  Food.  Flirting.  Drinking.  Good times.  Off we go.
Where we consumed plenty of alcohol.

Him

Me

With more flirting.
And oh yeah, lots of this…..

And some of this…..

Which…resulted in this:

(him.  not me.  Who knew I was *that* intoxicating, haha.  I’m his nemesis/kryptonite when it comes to drinking I swear.  DOH)

So between *nodding up above* that the morning was spent like this…..

(vi.sualize.us)

Oh.  And.  Just sayin…..

Parted ways mid/late afternoon.  Poor guy was in rough shape.  ((((Yummy))))

*THANKFULLY* the 7 dogs left alone at home were complete angels.  Well. Ok except for Phoebe (who is never, ever, EVER left alone…and ate a power cord.  Fuck…..)

PC and LM got home from his Jitz tournament. (he rocked it….go him! *grins proudly*) (LM was freakin *AWESOME*….go him! *grins proudly*)

Hmm…what sounds good for dinner.  Oh!  Mexican food!  What’s close?  On The Border!!!  But the very bestest part about the meal (I mean, besides our super hot, flirty waitress) were the Watermelon Margaritas.  I didn’t even have intentions of having anything…but hell, how can you pass up WATERMELON MARGARITAS?!?!  Uh, apparently not me. I had two.  *ahem*

Got home.  Put kiddo to bed (LP was still with her Nana Nan). Remembered Ginny, the Guinea, was hunkering outside the chicken coop.  She’d flown out the night before when she was spooked.  This is the ugliest bird you have ever seen.  These birds have been a thorn in my side since day one.  I have NO idea who’s brilliant idea it was to get them (uh…mine, shut up!) but my guilt got the best of me and I couldn’t leave her out of the coop another night.  So at 11:00 at night I’m out trying to wrangle her around the fence back into the coop.  Half an hour later- mission accomplished.  Stupid bird.

Sunday we attended my middle sisters graduation party.  She recently graduated from college with her teaching degree and is now off to spend 27 months in Honduras with the Peace Corps.  Impressive dedication.  Interesting having my entire family together.  Especially considering current dynamics.  Doesn’t happen very often. As in…hadn’t seen my one aunt and grandmother in over 10 years.  Uh, yeah……  Everyone was cordial.  Awesome weather.  Cousins entertained each other and we all made fakey fakey nice.  *shrug*

As I just mentioned- the weather the last few days has been awwwwwweeeeeesssssssooooooommmeee.  FINALLY!!!!  Very enjoyable.

Afterwards it was decided B & B would be perfect for dinner.  You know….Beer and Boobs…  AKA: Hooters.  ~wink~

So there you have it.

Happy Monday.  *yawn*

~ xo

Vixen

Man.  You know, come off a fabulous trip and get smacked in the face by drama.  So totally NOT a fan of drama.  Have worked super hard to get it out of my life, I avoid it.  And I had all these thoughts in my head regarding this and needing to vent and what not.  I went for a run Monday night, in hopes of clearing my head a bit.  And well, that went to shit when some fabulous dog owners [voice dripping with sarcasm] were under the assumption that the mandatory leash law at our lake doesn’t apply to them and their unruly animals.  Hiking in a state park?  That must mean it’s a DOG PARK, a free for all (no, it does NOT actually!).  Rules no longer apply to you!  (yes, they do actually!)

Had to break up a dog fight before it ensued.  Skinned to hell shin.  Sore ankle.  Hey, thanks for the ‘fun’, don’t bother apologizing!  Pfffbbbt, we’re cool.

*grumble, grumble*

Wanted to add a tiny disclaimer.  I have a thingy in my sidebar that states that this site is for adults, 18 years old and older.  It should also read that it’s NOT for close-minded dumbasses.  Oh.  But wait. I do…

Just sayin……

And.

Nothing I do in my personal life, or that I write about here has any bearing or effects whatsoever on my abilities as a parent.  I have amazing children.  They are polite, well mannered, well adjusted.  I *love* being a mom.  But, as I mentioned in another post a bit ago, women (ME!!!) can be multi-faceted.  *gasp* You don’t like me?  Don’t like what I do?  There’s this awesome little box with an X at the top of this page…..try clicking it.

And that’s all I have to say about that.

******

Photo recap of my trip this past weekend to come soon.  For now a teaser…..
(we’ve totally decided that our new clubbing attire should be this, no?  *grins*)

Don’t forget that this week is the 5th Anniversary of HNT!!!  And there’s a theme!  Go check it out and see what’s on the agenda.

*****

TFT is up!  Again to specify a bit about contributing to TFT. ANYONE can contribute. Girl, guy, couple, hell, your entire fraternity/bachelorette party… Snap. Send. It’s all cool. Be as simple, artsy, or whatever…as you’d like. It doesn’t have to be anything special! Or make it be. Hell, my point is, whatever you feel comfortable doing- I’ll take it and put up. ALSO, you can contribute anonymously if your little heart so desires. OR let me know how you would like to be linked/titled.

I’ll make it even easier. You want to become a regular contributor? You can send me one picture at a time. Or bunches. I’ll start a file and pull a picture from it each week. I’m easy people (I keep telling you all that! *grins*)!

*****

Have a fabulous Tuesday!

(tumblr)

~ xo

Vixen

Friday Favorite- but different, sorta, kinda

Alright.  My panties are in a bunch.  Ok.  Actually they are more than that. I’m fucking pissed off.  One of my dear friends, IRL and here in blogland, was attacked by a troll.  You know, those insanely opinionated, judgmental people who leave nasty comments under an anonymous name.  Gotta love people who hide behind hidden identities while lashing out and judging others, no?  Anyone who has a blog, has had a troll or two (fuck, I consistently block my most ‘adoring fan’).  They suck.

This anonymous commenter called this sexy, strong, bright, incredible woman out for talking about her kids AND sex on the same blog.  What?!  Us women can’t be sexual creatures and mom’s?!?!  *GASP*

I’m here to tell you right now.  That’s fucking bullshit.  I’ve been crucified and drug over the coals before for this same concept.  By judgmental, closed-minded women that become mom’s and never pull themselves out of ‘mommy-mode’.  Where is there a rule that says once we become mothers we can no longer think about or want sex?!  That we can no longer be sexy?!  It’s utterly ridiculous!  Some of THE sexiest women I know are mothers.

When you have a baby, and children, it’s so incredibly easy to get caught up in that ‘mommy mode’.  It happened after I had LM.  About a year after I had him I was fortunate enough to met a woman.  She was…amazing….as well as insanely intelligent and beautiful and mysterious and she drew me out of that shell I was ‘stuck in’.  I discovered my sexuality again.  And have continued down a path of metamorphosis ever since.  *Of course* I love being a mom.  But I also LOVE being a woman. I LOVE sex.  I have an insatiable sex drive. I LOVE women. I apparently also love men too (lol).

That doesn’t make me a bad person!  That doesn’t make ANY of us that have blogs that talk about our children one minute and sex the next bad people!  That makes us PEOPLE.  Having children doesn’t make you STOP being a sexual being.  I mean, good lord!

*end rant*

The blogger I am referring to, besides being all the things I’ve already mentioned her being, is also a hell of a photographer.  She knows who she is.  So, to that amazing woman- Hon, I *heart* you bunches and don’t you dare let those stupid, dimwit, trolls get to you.  Don’t change a thing about you or your blog.

*****

So. In other random news.

Date with Yummy (more of that to come later, check back, Saturday perhaps?).  *swoon*

Super busy week trying to prepare for the JBF sale.  It’s my 4th one that I’ve participated in.  Every year I say I’m gong to volunteer (there are most excellent benefits when you do)…  You’d think 8mo of lead time would help me prepare, but apparently when you add surgery with a recovery time you completely underestimated, well things get away from you.

I’m running 3miles a day now.  Close to my ‘normal’ routine.  It’s the little things that make you happy….right?

Not going to bore you with dog ‘issues’.  But Mick had a relapse earlier this week.  Entirely my fault.  I was avoiding confrontation with his vet. All is fine now.  Luckily I ‘know’ what the fix is and am able to get his meds right and was also able to to convince his vet of ‘my plan’.  But still…  Oh and Brittany turned 9yrs this week.  Crazy such a ginormous dog is doing so well at her age.

Ok.  I’m done.  Enjoy your wkend. As I said, good post, everyone has looked forward to, coming this wkend.

TFIG Baby!

~ xo

Vixen

Anesthesia and I don’t really go hand in hand… trying to manage the pain (*ooaf*), super loopy from the meds…..  So, as you probably guessed- no CQW.  Slowly trying to get back to normal.

*****

This is Daisy.  Daisy is a sweet, happy little dog.  She knows how to wiggle her ass like you’ve never seen when she’s happy (and she’s ALWAYS happy).

Daisy is also highly neurotic and an attention whore (we are nothing alike…..*ahem*).  She is also very possessive of me.
This is Daisy highly pissed off and quite agitated.  This is her evil stare or look of death.

This is why.  She is beside herself that this cat had the nerve to come lay next to me, in HER spot, while she was off getting a drink of water.  Notice how the cat could care less?  (LOL)

*****

There will be HNT this week!  And Friday Favorites!!!

Happy HUMP Day!!!

(tumblr)

~ xo

Vixen

(edited to move this up top)
Haven’t done this in awhile…. This is my new favorite song on my playlist. Kinda plays into my mood this week a bit.

******

So.  I had actually been working on a CQW post and found myself feeling anxious and overwhelmed by the time and thought I was having to put into it.  And I ended up saying- screw it.  Instead what you get is random jumble of thoughts.  I mentioned too that I’d like to use the case I served as a juror in for some CQW topics.  I’m having a hard time though processing my thoughts regarding it.  I guess, quite honestly, it really traumatized me on several levels.  The judgement placed on what I thought was a ‘normal’ teenage boy.  The insanity of what an angry father did…  I’m finally just now not having disturbing dreams about it.  Gah.  Not fun stuff.

My mind is racing. I need it to slow the fuck down.  The unfortunate fun part of my neurosis is that I become overwhelmed easily.  And when I’m overwhelmed I become frazzled and unable to concentrate or think clearly and often times in turn I get very irritable.  I admit it, I don’t handle stress very well.  Or being overwhelmed.

*deep breaths*

I am overwhelmed.  The time change- while I LOVE the added light- has seriously fucked up my sleeping habits.  Or rather, lack there of.  I’ve gotten a handful of hours of sleep this week and had a completely crazy busy week.  PC and I are heading to California on Thursday (more to come on this tomorrow….stay tuned ~wink~).  I’ve had a slew of things to get done before we leave…getting the house and animals ready for their babysitter to come stay with them.  Prepping for us to be gone.  Laundry.  Packing.  And not just for *us* but for the kiddos who are staying with their grandparents.  Arrangements for pick ups and drop offs.  Primping appointments (what?! I’m a girl!  Don’t act like you all are surprised!).  The list goes on.

But it will all be worth it come Thursday afternoon when I take my first sip of beer and am amongst super awesome friends in warm temps, with palm trees in my view.  Ahhh…..

I do have to say, our weather has been FABULOUS.  Which definitely makes me a bit more sun-shiney.  I’ve gotten in some incredible runs and am finally feeling back in shape after such a long, rough winter.  I was forced to take SO much time off this winter.  From when I badly cut my foot last fall, to being constantly so so sick (I swear my lungs are just finally feeling ‘normal’ again), and then the harsh winter where snow was almost always on the ground.  Yeah…put a damper on things.  Temps and snow I can work around with the treadmill.  A cut foot and being sick all winter…not so much.

******

Packing….  Got my jeans, bikini, tank tops, sweatshirt, large long haired cat…..  Does he know he’s not coming with???  *snicker

******

Happy HUMP Day!!!

~xo

Vixen

Mute Monday-

Chasing Wild Horses documentary.

“This narrow 41 Km sandbar is located 300Km southeast of Halifax, Nova Scotia. Known for hundreds of years as “The Graveyard of the Atlantic”, it is the site of over 275 shipwrecks, and the home of more than 300 wild horses.

It is a world that exists by its own rules, a place with out trees, without shade, and without shelter. It is a place where I have witnessed true peace and unquestionable love among its occupants- the wild horses of Sable Island.”  ~Dutesco Art

(click the link above for this weeks participants and theme, or the button to see what MM is all about)

******

I know you all are sitting on the edge of your seats, anxiously waiting to hear what we came home from the Stockshow with.  (shut up, lol)  And the answer is- nothing.  Here’s the thing.  We have five cats and seven dogs.  Bringing home a rabbit or guinea pig would be like hanging a sign on the poor things cage that says  “BAIT: DO NOT EAT”.  Seriously.  It just seems rather cruel to me.  To all animals involved.  And honestly, while Phoebe (or as PC has nicknamed her- Peebe *snort*) is the cutest thing EVER, she has been awful to housebreak.  The girl has no shame, running to squat in front of you after you’ve just spent 10min outside with her coercing her to potty.  *SIGH*  I have housebroken many (many) puppies and she is by far the most difficult.  So to even consider adding more to my plate….uh yeah.  No thanks.

Some pictures from the day….

You have to understand why I love this pic of the kitties.  The kitty on the right is LP’s.  Her name is Alley.  She *adores* LP.  If you want to find Alley, you look for LP.  The gray cat on the left is Riley, the laundry basket is his all time favorite place ever.  Both kiddos spent the night with their cousins Sunday night and I’m guessing Alley was lonely bc she decided to join Riley.  If you note, the other funny thing about this pic is that Riley is seriously the BIGGEST cat I have ever met.  He’s HUGE.  While Alley is teeny tiny.  But the two are the bestest of friends.
Awww…..  *grins*

******

Happy Monday!!!

The kiddos have the day off of school and this is how I will be spending my Monday morning.  *wink*

(vi.sualize.us)

~ xo

Vixen